Life

2010-08-12T01:06:00.000+08:00

Fuck this ghost month.

This is getting the he'll out of my life! Nothing goes smoothly as what I do. Clubbing tonight, cannot go. Kbox tonight also cannot go. Fuck la!

Why must I get into this type of shit?? Must I born to let other people suffer with me? Tell me why!!!!!

Stupid heaven! Can't you just let me die?

2010-07-09T22:47:00.002+08:00

It been so long since I update blog and now I'm back!

Today was a great day! Went to watch Triple Tap, play at Timezone and had my dinner at Newyork Newyork with Sihui. Haha!!

Just make a phone call to Miss May about my face problem. She say she will give me special price and most important, she want to cure my face! By Monday, I will call her to know more deatails and hopefuly this time, my face can be cure!

I want to earn more money! I want to go clubbing and other stuff! But I still must give my hard earn money to my parents. Must help them with the bills.

Tired~~ Time to exercise more and pray hard for me that tomorrow I can pass my job interview at 10am. Haha!! xP

Nights =)

2010-06-19T11:04:00.001+08:00

Having holiday is like having school days to me... My friend and I still have to go back to school for assignment. Reach school at 10, leave school at 10 too but is10pm!!! What the he'll..

What have i done?? Know a girl for 3 days and she on love with me...die!!!

May I should listen to Jenny words to study hard.. I don't wish to follow my parents footstep. I want to earn more money and have more time to company my future family for acivitice. Haha !!

Feel so tired with my life.. Hope today time can pass faster... Wish to forget everything.. =)

2010-05-26T01:04:00.002+08:00

I knew this will happen if I make this choice and yet I choose to follow.
I believe that I can change myself for her...
Looking At the result of me and her...
We Are getting AwAy then the past.. We hArdy meSsage each other just like stranger...
I wish I never make this choice as we can so close to each other..

2010-05-19T00:35:00.002+08:00

Just have no idea how crazy I am when I hear that message and calling fail to reach her... I start to get worry and my mind start to wonder what happen to her.. Heart beat getting faster every sec it goes...

Curse myself for not doing my best, protect and stay by her side when she need someone. Curse myself for running all these time, Cursing myself for not telling her the truth while all these time I was thinking about her.

Reach home start to pray that nothing happen. Really happy to hear her voice on that phone. Knowing that she save and place my heart at rest.

I really don't know what to do, If something happen to her. It would really hurt me so much since she is the girl that I like so much and yet anything happen to her.

2010-05-05T22:02:00.004+08:00

Great day of shopping!!! Just can't control myself when I saw the anime "One Piece" shirt is back to Singapore again!!! AHHH~~~ I want to buy!!! T.T

Went to orchard and somerset 313. Start walking since afternoon non stop till high tea. Had pastaminia then continue walk again.

I wish I have alot of money so I can buy all the things I want. haha!!!

Also Today Is 21st Jacelyn Birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIANG MU CHENG!!! :D

Sit in the kitchen and think about myself alone... Think back of the past... Find myself super useless... Why I can't let go of it... Why Must I do this?? Why am I scared to reject again?? Find myself very stupid for doing all these things which are not important to me anymore...

Don't even have the courage to ask why you want to leave... Just because I scared to know... Keeping everything to myself... Since the day you leave me, it feels like I'm being ripped apart everyday... Smiling everywhere I go and yet I feel the pain in my heart every min and sec...

I really want to share the happiness with you..

I don't know I can have 1 more chance if I ask again... But I want to try it again.

2010-05-01T21:26:00.003+08:00

Why my tears flow down??

Why my feeling heart ache ??

Why all the memories flash back??

Why??

Why I can't forget everything this bitter and heart broken memories that has been living almost 3 months??

What can I do?? It just hurt so much...

2010-04-29T03:37:00.002+08:00

It been a long time I feel so stress in the middler of the night... When I really thought I have finish clear the problem of some important event on the day then I realise that the chalet I book is super small... Wonder how can I put more then 40 people into 1 tiny chalet in the very first day ??

It was totally like OMG and WHAT THE FUCK!

Want to give up this org for this big event.. But It going to my one and one chance to make it perfect for my whole life! There no way I can stop. Can't think about what will happen if I cancel this event at this time... Think my parents will never stop treating me like small kid after all... So I must show them I can do it without their help and not to let them worry but also got to do a perfect one.

Time for me to grow up! Look at kelvin, how he plan for Joanne Birthday. Without other people help to think and worry for him... Now look at I... How is my planing going?? Only like 40% done?!?!

Aiyo... Die la... Now I need to redo my planing again... So many things to do... but if I think everyone enjoy themselves on the day of the event. HAHA!! IT GONNA BE A CRAZY DAY!! =P

then I must not stop at all.

Thanks to Candy! Lucky with her help, I am able to book a bigger chalet for almost up to 40 person and 8 person for the night use. With big living room set, TV and games table. Dining room and air-conditioned bedrooms furnished with beds, wardrobes, dressers, bedside tables and wall fans. Lastly, BBQ pit and a fully equipped kitchen.

This is so much better then putting everyone in a tiny litter "room" where the BBQ is outside of the "room". HAHA!! Now I need to plan the food and other stuff and 9 May is Mother Day!! I need to save more money and think of a plan... Wonder what can I do for my mother??

Haix...

Shall meet Jacelyn after school for Movie (Ip Man 2) at Bugis and I still need to rush down to temple to bai bai.. Pray Huixian can pass her interview and hope I can get into the CGC to work! There nothing much I can do for her... All I can do is all these bahx... Then at night shall head to Joanne Birthday Chalet at night. Hoo Ya.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOANNE!

Pei Huixian and Jacelyn to job interview till afternoon, guess around 4 plus shall head home to change and head to work at the bloody Times bookstore.. FUCK sai.. Totally hate the people I working with... ==

Just wish to quit this bloody job at ONCE!

2010-04-26T22:28:00.002+08:00

Finally had my first day of Mocap today. Not bad.. Seem to like this module alot.. HAHA!! Hope can get DIST in this module. *Praying Hard*

Just can't think I have to wear a black suit or what "thingy" to move and act at the real time, where my movement will be recorded inside the computer and throw in a model. HAHA!!

Hmm... Maybe I can be a Mocap specialties in future ? HAHA!! jk jk~~

Went for jogging after school, push myself jog all the way... And guess what.. I become merlion number 2. Vomit water at the fitness conner ==

Went to 7-11 to bought a drink, and I start to vomit again under my block and IT ALL WATER AGAIN!!! what the hell... ==

Aiyo.. Now having body ache... Don't know is I getting old or I just too long never exercise liao.. Hiax... hope tomorrow can wake up and go jogging again.

Time to sleep again...

Hoo ya.. I would like to say thanks to someone during the jogging.. Think without her... I would not have made it till the end, might just give up half way.... :)

2010-04-19T23:06:00.002+08:00

Nothing much about today... Lesson cancel today just nice for outing. haha

Wanted to go for jogging but over sleep in the morning.. Trying to download Maplesea setup since yesterday but somehow it seem to have error with the patch.. Haix... Got to redownload again..

Got cheated by Raffles and Meng. Told to Meet up with them for gym at YCK mrt station. Receive a phone call to meet them South canteen instead. Walk to South Canteen from YCK mrt station then walk back to YCK gym. Realise Raffles and Meng never wear sport wear so cannot use the gym system... ==

Sian... Walk to the nearest bus stop, took bus to AMK for mac, Order Double Macspicy meal for lunch. Went to k-Pool after lunch and catch one movie (Kickass) then head straight home.

Feeling hot inside my stomache after eating the Double Macspicy... PAIN!!!! >w<"

2010-04-14T22:23:00.003+08:00

Wishing today would be sunday so I can have my day off and rest all I want.. Too tired to work anymore.. Sian...

Found Myself with eye bags while washing my face.. Dark and heavy of eye bag...

Can just wonder how many hours i have sleep for the past 3 days... Just don't understand why this problem always stay with me.. Sticking to me like a glue..

Haix...

Nights Everyone.. Got to sleep.. Hope tomorrow will be a better day..

2010-04-09T23:24:00.004+08:00

It been a long time since I try working Full Shift(8am to 12am) then have to work 8am to 5pm(A shift) which I can only sleep less then 4 hours. Feeling super tired when I work in the morning but feel awake in the afternoon till now.. Just can't make myself to take a nap no matter how hard I try in the bus...

Just wonder why I want to work so hard..
Wonder why I do all these for...
Wonder why Who am I doing for..

I can feel the energy flowing within me when her image run on my mind no matter how tired or how much I wish to give up... She is the one after all... She is the one that is important to me...

I'm feeling very scared... So scared that I don't remember her... Too scared to repeat the same mistake... But I still want to say this I Still Like her! I want to wait for her..

This feeling is still in my heart... No matter how I tell myself that she do not belong to me... Try Jogging, Punching the wall and shout out.. I just can't forgive myself and forget everything... I just can't...

Haix...

2010-04-06T15:38:00.002+08:00

So long never update blog. Have alot of things I wanted to tell. Just don't know where should I start... Just don't know how... Tears just flow down my eyes in the middle of nowhere and I can feel the pain in my heart... Image flashing in my mind... No words can explain the feeling I having.

Been busy working almost everyday, trying hard to save money since studio project ends. Fighting with baka politics in the company as I was only working as Part Time Book Seller with the bloody pay of $6. Pushing myself over the limit, work "P" today, tomorrow "A" then next day "8am - 8pm" and follow by "A". Only had 1 day off in a week.

Sometimes, I only sleep less then 6 hours then off for work... Never complain... Just Smile and act like nothing happen, moving forward to reach for my goal... No matter how tired I am. I want to earn every dollars and cents for my parents and my future. I know my pay is very little and I sick of this company but as I can't stop. I must hang on to it...

Went out with Jacelyn for window shopping at Bugis and play mahjong with Huixian, Ah Jiao and Jenny at Huixian house during my off days. Trying hard to spend every hours and mins in meaningful ways, Treasure my only off day with my friends and my Brothers. =)

Saw Dina(The girl like for 5 years) in Changi Airport Terminal 3 Basement 2. She doing well. Have a small talk with her and saw her boyfriend. Feel happy for her as she look so happy with her boyfriend... Guess I did was right, I believe she can find someone better then me and this really come true... After all, I never give her the answer she looking for...

1 more year of study before I go into NS. Still have Attachment and Final Year Project to be complete in year 3 but I will push myself to jog after work for the mean time while i still can.

Now Please My Body! Don't break down on me at this time... Never expect myself to fall sick in "short" off days(4 days)... Having fever and other sickness at this time... But this does not mean I will give up. I don't want to see doctor and waste money on it.

I must recover within these 2 off days before I start work. Although I am not strong.. But I could become strong for the sake of her. Nothing done to stop me!

2 more days... Memories...

Maybe something are meant to keep it as a secret after all. Sometimes we never know what the final result will turn out to be... If the secret were leak out...

2010-03-13T00:03:00.002+08:00

What should I say?? Just feeling very piss + sad with my family side brother and sister only....

Tomorrow still got to work am shift... haix..

Nites Everyone!

2010-03-08T00:36:00.002+08:00

After 12am will be 8th of march, another month have just pass... After so long, I then realize it my mistake after all... It not her fault at the first place and I never blame her at all... I only blame myself never does the job what the men should do...

As a men, I should protect her, listen to her, care for her, carry her problem away and let her feel happy in my arms but I never do at all... I only do was to add my personal problem to her... Increase her weight with my problem...

Now I really wish to treasure her but I don't think I have anymore chance...

2010-03-04T01:13:00.004+08:00

It been a Hungry day in school..

Skip lunch and dinner for stay back in school to do Studio Project till tio gastic pain.. WTH!!

Stay back in school till 7 plus 8pm then took friend car back home... Rest awhile then start take my dinner, went to my bedroom then I feel like fainting... Everything around me was spinning, spin like cyclone... 360 degree... (Don't know is it me that spin or my stuff spin ?? HAHA!!)

Finding hard to walk to the nearest chair and feel like vomit while everything was spinning and look like it was almost blackout too...

Manage to pull out the chair and sit down, close my eyes and breath slowly... My eyes hurt while trying to open my eyes... Never had this before... First time having this fainting feeling...

Feel so much better after a rest... Feel so sweaty! Sit on the stood alone in my bedroom with no fan... Watch my sweat flow like free, better go catch a bath first then do my presentation slide for the final presentation tomorrow.

Less then12 hours to go before my holiday come and 11.30am will be my group presentation... Hope I can do it with wonderful colors =P

Hoo ya... Damn!!! Can't believe I bring my hp to school with only 1 last bar of battery... =_="

Forget to charge last night... Hiax...

Alright Then!!! HOLIDAY!! WAIT FOR ME!! HERE I COME!!! :D

2010-03-02T23:10:00.003+08:00

What a tired day.... Went to school today at 10am, find myself alone is the room with my other group friend. Sit there, surfing net and wait for my team member till 12plus then head to Amk to eat Aston, reach there then know the shop has not open yet... Sian... I miss their bake potato...

Totally spoilt mood...

Never Mind, went back to school, continue my project while listen to music... Help my friend with their character model and load them into my game project... Touch up my part and pass it to my friend to combine all the game level as one.

Dots!! Got a call from my mum 5 plus... As dinner will be cancel due to my aunt will bring them to eat steamboat in Bugis... So last min then tell me... But lucky for me, I able to meet Huixian, Jacelyn and Candy for dinner today, Went to 1 of the Japanese food restaurants to have dinner.

Couldn't think of a place to have dinner so decide to try out the new restaurants. Wanted to eat their ramen but they have sold out all.. So I only go for the rice dish and other side dish... Feel like dying while waiting for the food to arrived...

Had a wonderful dinner with them! =D

Went for a short shopping with them after dinner then sent candy home... Just can't believe candy bought me walk 1 round of yishun before sent her home... Now my legs are breaking apart... Pain.... T_T

No matter how bad my days was... With your smile and laughters can brighten up my day.

Just feel so nice with you around!

Thank You Very much Girl! =)

Now it time for me to sleep... See Ya and Nites!

2010-03-02T01:05:00.006+08:00

One Shot - JLS Lyrics

She's the kinda girl boys read about in magazines, glossy magazines
She is the only one I think about leading lady in my dreams
Hey I have waited so long, to gather up my courage she has got me love drunk fumbling my words
Times running out, gotta do it now
She's the one I cannot live without

Yeah... she's the one I cannot live without
Yeah... yeah... yeah... yeah

You only get one shot so make it count
You might never get this moment again
The clock is ticking down, it's the final round
So tell me what it is that's stopping you now

You never know unless you try
You'll only regret sitting wondering why
You only get one shot so watch this moment go by
When love's on the line

I never thought that I would get the chance to tell this girl how I feel, tell her how I feel
Sometimes I pinch myself a mile away, this can't be real, this can't be real
Move faster can't wait any longer, gotta do something before she gets away
Do it like a movie, take her by the hand, I'm gonna love this girl until the end

You only get one shot so make it count
You might never get this moment again
The clock is ticking down, it's the final round
So tell me what it is that's stopping you now
You never know unless you try
You'll only regret sitting wondering why
You only get one shot so watch this moment go by when love's on the line

When love's on the line

When love's on the line

She is the definition of beautiful she knocks me off my feet
I'mma tell her she's my everything, tell her that she's all I need, that I know she's the only reason my heart beats
Da da da... Da da da

You might never get this moment again
(You might never get this moment again x2)
You only get one shot so make it count
You might never get this moment again (never get this moment again)
The clock is ticking down, it's the final round
So tell me what it is that's stopping you now
You never know (never know) unless you try (unless you try)
You'll only regret sitting wondering why (wondering why)
You only get one shot so watch this moment go by
When love's on the line

When love is on the line, when love is on the line, when love is one the line

When love's on the line (I wish I had one more chance, I wish I had one more chance)

When love's on the line.

2010-02-28T22:51:00.003+08:00

Yesterday went out with my Secondary NCC Buddy for prawning at Bishan in the morning.. Fail to wake up at 6.45am but lucky kenny keep spamming me with calls at 7am.. Should meet Jinglong and kenny at the bus stop at 7am but because of late wake up, got meet them around 7.45am. Feel Very Pai Sei to let them wait for me again. =_=

Had Mac fish burger for breakfast then took bus 852 to Bishan. Reach there at 9am, pay $30 for 3 hours to catch all the prawn all you can but I had to leave at 11am to meet my ITE friend. Give my 1 hour to my friend to take over me. Sit there for 2 hours only able to caught a 1 -2 Big Prawn then rest was small prawn.

After meeting up with my friend at AMK mrt station, took train to Buona Vista then Mr Kee(ITE Lecturer) pick us up to his house. We talk about our past, current and future plan, listen to what can be done better while having lunch with him. Leave his house around 5pm then reach home at 6pm... Tried to go out...

Reach home and follow kenny back home to park his bike and went for dinner with my secondary AVA friends, then head to Chong Pand for some cold and soft "bean curd (Tofu)". HAHA!!

Feeling Super full after Dinner + Tofu, Follow Candy and Kenny to one of the Pub for 1 tank of Froster. Just can't believe we 3 able to finish it within less then 1 hour. Took cab home, reach around 1 plus 2am. Have a litter chat with my mum then head for bed.... Totally Knock Out...

Will upload some photo when I get my hands on it... Sorry about this =X

2010-02-22T19:29:00.008+08:00

Yesterday went back to school for the Briefing for the year 3 IAP and FYPJ at LTM1...

Got a shocking news that our holiday will be cut short to 8 of March if we got into the 1st patch of the IAP or FYPJ... I also not sure I will be in the 1st patch or the 2nd patch but pray hard I could be in the 1st patch of IAP.

Just thinking of me working the company just make my heartbeat goes faster. haha... But with my current standard of coding knowledge I scared that I might not able to make it thought....

Worst thing about to happen, Just think of all my planing like movie, kbox, buffet, shopping and other stuff during holiday will be gone ... Start work from 9am till 6pm, by the time I reach home will be around 7 plus 8 plus. Too tired to going out...

Now I finally understand what my friend say " There No Life When Attachment Start".

Got a meaningful email from my friend and this is what it say:

爱一人

如果你不爱一个人,

请放手.

好让别人有机会爱她.

如果你爱的人放弃了你,

请放开自己,

好让自己有机会爱别人.

有的东西你再喜欢也不会属于你的,

有的东西你再留恋也注定要放弃的.

人生中有许多种 .

但别让自己为一种伤害.

有些缘分是注定要失去的,

有些缘分是永远都不会有好结果的,

爱一个人不一定要拥有,

但拥有一个人就一定要好好的去爱她.

男人哭了是因为他真的爱了.

女人哭了是因为她真的放弃了.

如果真诚是一种伤害,

我选择谎言;

如果谎言一种伤害,

我选择沉默;

如果沉默是一种伤害,

我选择离开.

如果失去是苦，

你怕不怕付出 ,

如果迷乱是苦，

你会不会选择结束,

如果追求是苦，

你会不会选择执迷不悟 ,

如果分离是苦，

你要向谁倾诉,

好多事情都是后来才看清楚,

好多事情当时一点也不觉得苦!!!!

***爱&缘分***

１.她無聊時陪她〃

２.她難過時安慰她〃

３.男生要主動點〃

４.多約女友出去〃

５.不能讓女友主動約〃

６.讓她每天都開心愉快〃

７.要好好對待女友〃

８.順從女友的意〃

９.不要讓她傷心難過〃

１０.當她被欺負要立刻去保護她〃

１１.不要隱瞞女友事情〃

１２.不能背叛女友〃

It been 2 weeks and 1 day since the "Case" happen... It quite true, I seem to fail all the points except number 12... I still keeping the it to myself no matter what happen... All the memories still laying there with me...

Hoo well... Still have Studio Project to finish...

2010-02-17T09:36:00.005+08:00

Look like Chinese new Year is coming to end soon... Once again, I have to repeat this again... Still can't believe I had an family trip during CNY and Valentine... I could just say it was a horrible trip I had... Never had a good meal once I reach there as I was trying hard to skip a few meal as some of the dish was so hot!!!

Wish to have a bath the water we use to bath in Singapore was so clean but the water was brown color at the hotel... Sign will be place near the toilet to inform us that the water cannot be drink from the tap. Blackout happen a few times at night, It was so dark that I can't even see my hand when the blackout happen. Wanted to shop was hard for us as most all the shop was close on the Chinese New Year... Communication was hard with the people who is staying there as they don't understand English, all we can do was pointing here and there to communicate..

Stay at hotel watch channel 8 and channel U at the First/Second day of the New Year after swimming in the afternoon till night... Bought alot of beer to the hotel, the price was so cheap but the taste was like... So CMI!!! =_=

No matter how many cans beer I drink, I don't seem to get drunk... Never expect the price of an can of Coca Cola was more expensive then the can of beer... Hiax...

Everything Seem So CMI... I really Miss My Buddy/Friends and Pork!!! Oppsss... =X

What a scary ride I had... Watch Final Destination 3 on the boat on the way back to Singapore and it was high tide so the boat was turning from side to side around 30 degree... Some people was vomiting as they are not use to the sea wave or seasick. Had to hold my mother hands telling her everything will be alright... Pray hard we can reach Singapore safely... Reach home on the Monday night around 10pm plus.. Leave everything in the kitchen, catch a good bath then wanted to blog but too tired then sleep first...

Look like all these burden is back to me again... Don't seem to able to sleep well... Woke up a few times at night due to some dream... (not this trip dream, but other dreams...) Woke up around 8am helping my mother in the kitchen cooking for her brothers and sisters cause later they will be coming for CNY. Yes!! Money~~!! $_$

Then went to singing with my family member... Chiong beer with my cousin, end up he was first to got drunk... Think we drank around 8 - 9 jug of beer and play pool with my uncle... Finally can have a good taste of Singapore beer. haha... Reach home around 2am plus... Pack up nicely then went to sleep...

School meeting at 1pm today... Almost fell down at the staircase while rushing for the meeting... After 5 min of meeting with the teacher in charge with our studio project at level 5, rush off again to meet kelvin, Yilok and Ziu for Sakura buffet @ Northpoint then meet Xian and Yilok for dinner then head home to rest...

I feeling very tired of it... Too tired to continue anymore... I don't wish to walk this path anymore... I really want to stop and cry it out, let this pain out of me But I can't... What can I do but in the end, It doesn't even matter....

By smiling was the way to solve this problem?? Look like I can't help myself but to do it...

2010-02-13T10:09:00.002+08:00

Look like i going to leave Singapore in less then 1hour for family trip and yet i still blogging here.. It will be a 2 days 1 night at indo. Just can't believe I will traveling during Chinese New Year and valentine too... Hiax...

Everything was pack last night. My parent seem to be looking forward to the trip as they will taking in the living room last night what they going to do, what they going to buy and what to eat and other stuff... I was the only one siting in front of my laptop in my bedroom, staring at the screen doing nothing listen to the music and my heart aches secretly... Just a hint of your smile can me feel fine again... went off to bed around 1plus...

Wish everything was just a dream... An endless dream that I could just stay in it... I have no choice but to face the truth... If i know this is going to happen, I would keep you from figuring out how I feel about you, cause then we would drift apart. I would rather hold my breath, bit my lips telling you the truth...

Anyway, Early wishing Happy Chinese New year and Happy Valentine too

2010-02-12T22:01:00.002+08:00

I don't know I should be happy or sad... My mind was fill with thought and stuff... So many thing happen for the past few weeks...

Thing which i never wish for has finally happen... Totally feel so lost...

Family trip tomorrow for holiday but I don't seem to be looking forward to it...

Smile appear on my face whenever I think of you but it hard to deal the pain of losing you...

Is that all I can do was just keep walking with a smile on my face everyday pretend there nothing happen at all...

You are not alone Girl... Memories of you still within me and I will right here waiting for you...

2010-02-10T01:39:00.002+08:00

living in this world day by day, I realize that I'm nothing without you.. I was wrong, forgive me...

2010-02-09T00:32:00.003+08:00

Have I really change so much??

What so different from the past of me and the present of me??

By Changing so much, Is it going to be a good news or a bad news ??

Am I who I really am ??

2010-02-05T15:39:00.004+08:00

AI assignment and presentation was finally over... I also not sure I can pass this or not... Everyone was talking about the next assignment that we are facing.... Looking at their face thinking what assignment I still left with...

Still left with Multi-player, Adgev and Studio Project... Just how long can we get these assignment done and over with it??

I NEED A BREAK!!!! FUCK THE ASSIGNMENT!!! PROGRAMMER LIFE SUCK TO THE MAX!!!! Hiax...

Just wish to give up... Rushing assignment day and night... Got to worry about the presentation and the report too... I don't mind dreaming her but having CODE floating around in my dream every night can be very sad and scared... you know ??

Come to the fact is... Whenever I wish to give up... Your image will be the first that come to me... realize that now is not the time to give up. After taking a deep breath, telling myself cannot be so selfish... Even you can do it, Why I can't do it?

Just like to say this...

Thank You Very Much Girl!

I Would have Give Up Very Soon Without Knowing You!

Life Would Not Have So Much Fun Without You!

Sorry For Not By Your Side When You Need Help!

Once again: Thank You Very Much Girl and JiaYou!!

2010-02-02T22:51:00.003+08:00

Been busy for these few days.... So many assignment to do... Haix...

It was a 4 people group project assignment but it turn out to be 1 men show... Got to rush for the game level design Warcraft editor since Saturday evening... Couldn't think of anything but somehow idea keep coming to my mind while I was sleeping but the moment I woke up, the idea was gone... Only can try my very best to recap what was the idea about...

What a Shitty Morning I have... =_=''

Went to sleep around 10pm last night but sprain my neck today... Pain man... Don't seem to able to turn my head to my left direction.. Hiax...

Finally able to hand in 1 of the assignment today... Should meet Huixian for late lunch at 4 plus but thanks to the game level bug... I got to stay till 4 plus... Feel Super bad for the lady to wait for guy like me...

Walk very fast from my school lab till the school gate and start to running to Yio Chu Kang Mrt Station opposite Bus Stop. Trying to catch a breath at the overhead bridge but saw bus 853 coming... ok then... =_='' Time To Run Again!!!

Reach her block and had a can of coke... Ahhh~~ I never drink coke since ITE around 2 years to 3 years... Sit down and watch MTV (给我一首歌的时间 - 周杰伦) while waiting for Huixian to be ready.

Went to KFC for late lunch/dinner with Huixian, then later with Kenny and Candy at Burger King. Force to eat fries by kenny... How am I going to finish it after having a heavy meal at KFC ?? Lucky got Huixian. She help me to clear some of of the fries so I'm able to finish it. =P

Play Daytona 2 at Funland and I'm the third *Sob Sob* Kana bang here and there till I don't know where am I lor... All I heard was the banging of the car and saw heavy smoke while trying to catch up with them... but It was sooooo fun playing with them~~~ hahaha :D

anyway, Time to do assignment ba... Still left with Multi-Player and Audio Assignment for tomorrow and AI on Thursday...

Hope I can finish it... Sianzor... >_<"

2010-01-30T19:44:00.000+08:00

Today was her last day of work and she forget to bring the nougat which she bought yesterday. Think she going to miss her pat more then the evil stuff nurse at the workplace. hahaha

Feeling worry when I think about her sickness and she got to work with her sexy voice for the past few days. Her voice seem to be getting better day by day after seeing doctor. Soon can hear her singing and her loud voice. opps =X

Thank You Very Much Girl! You took away 1 of my biggest problem of it. haha =)

Times flies too fast... Living in fear and feeling super stress when I think about the assignment as the dateline are getting nearer and nearer... I will be having my Studio Project 4 in less that 2 weeks times and yet, I still have these assignment which I got to hand in by next week...

Tomorrow plan to ton night at Yishun Starbuck with my friends to rush for the assignment, feel free to talk to me on msn as I will be online all night long... Time to burn Mid-Night Oil again... =_=

Lai pei me ba ~~~~

Now... wonder I can really finish it or not... Haix....

Have to hand in

Game Level Design Warcraft Editor on Tuesday
Multi-Player Aissgnment + Audio Assignment on Wednesday
Final AI on Thursday

Pray Hard I can finish it... ><"

2010-01-27T03:54:00.002+08:00

Haix... Still Helping my friend with his COMG assignment at this hour(3.55am)...

Wonder what time I can go sleep and will I able to wake up for tomorrow lesson at 9am...

Someone Please Wake Me Up at 7.30am!!!

Look like it a gone be a impossible mission as everyone had went to sleep... Haix...

Hmmm... Thinking of you just made me refill back with energy again to do the work... hahaha =P

2010-01-27T03:54:00.001+08:00

Off to watch Legion with Candy and Huixian @ Cathay(AMK HUB). Reach around 7 plus 8pm. Met candy at Mos Burger first then met Huixian at Cathey together. Wanted to buy drinks but the bloody people who order things was so slow... So decide to give up and head to the movie instread.

The movie was talking about "God, Human, Angels... And More Angels process onto the human.. " Killing each other, trying to get their hands on the baby. Not a bad show after all.. No chain lighting cast. haha...

Feeling Super hungry after the movie, so went for dinner with Candy at somewhere behind interchange coffee shop. My stomach still feeling empty after eating fishball noodle $2.80 with only 5 mouth.

Sent Candy home and I slowly walk to the nearest bus stop, my mind start to fill up with problem again while waiting for bus back home...

Am I thinking too much ?? Haix...

Sometimes... It just hurt me too much for me to think about it...

I also not sure by doing this is right or wrong...

All I can do is to solve the problem one by one..

I can say is that I never regret for having this feeling for you.

2010-01-25T15:39:00.000+08:00

WTS!!! Pain... Pain... Pain...

This pain is killing me... Garrr!!!

Body ache every where....

No matter how many tiger brand things I use, the pain is still there... Haix...

Haix... Wonder how she doing at work... Sick + Case Study Presentation = Hard Mission!!

But Don't worry, she can do it one la...

Guess so... =X

haha.. Just Joking~~ JiaYou!! $10 please for DST! (Daniel Services Tax) :P

Hope she recover fast and Pass her Case study presentation with flying colour! :)

OK then.. Time for school with my body ache... Shit man... Pain... =_=

2010-01-24T13:44:00.000+08:00

Went to Orchard with Huixian and Yilok on friday after school.. reach home still need to do house work then I allow to go out.. Rush doing all the housework like mad... Almost out of breath =_="

Leave house at 1plus 2pm but there there around 3plus 4pm... super late har ...

So smart of me! I went to Far East Shopping Centre instead of Far East Plaza... Running up and down to all the level but end up was my mistake... feel so bad that I have to make 2 beautiful ladies wait for me.. PS~~ PS~~ >_<"

Follow the girls shopping was the most dangerous thing which I ever done... but it was fun, got to see alot of things which I never thought of it.. Lucky no sore eyes! haha xD

Huixian bought a very beautiful dress for her Dinner and Dance (D&D) at Far East Plaza but I never get a chance to see her wearing it... Hiax... Can only think about it... haha... Think she will be gorgeous wearing that dress! :)

Jacelyn and Kelvin join us after work then we head to woodlands for dinner at Mac... Order Macspicy with twister fries and Ice lemon tea... But somehow, I found woodland Macspicy is much more better then NYP Macspicy... NICE TO THE MAX~~~ Trust me =_="

Ah Min (Huixian Big Sister) join us to look for Kelvin D&D shirts.. We all try to help Kelvin by Matching with "Nice Looking Shirt Design" with "Nice Looking Tie". But he still need to have his wife permission to buy.

Done with window Shopping with them, head to interchange and took bus to Yishun.. Ah Min was so funny, Poor Ah Bee was talking to the phone and got make fun of it. she made Huixian laught till Madness.. hahahahhahaha..

Head home and bath... What a eyes pain + body pain and Happy to see her day. haha xP

Went to sleep but cannot sleep... Keep thinking of her... Realise that what I want was her... Looking at her just simply made me smile.. Thank You Very Much girl! :)

Saturday afternoon, went to gym with Kelvin and head to woodlands for lunch.. ( WTS!! Eat KFC after gym... =_= ) Wanted to see her again so I decide to come along too..

Window Shopping again.. Back to same looking for Kelvin D&D shirt again but with different group. hahaha... Send her off to interchange and I shall head home to do my AI.. Better finish it before I see her demon coming after me.. hahaha.. Just joking har >_<"

Do AI Assignment till 8 plus 9pm then head to Jinkee house play Majong... But I can only do my work while they play... What to do... As I promise her... haha

Valentine is coming and it also fall on Chinese New Year... Die... I also not in Singapore... HOW HAR!!! Should plan something secret to scared her!! Muahahaha xD

Got a video clip about Valentine from my friend facebook. Please Enjoy :)

2010-01-21T17:59:00.000+08:00

Had a Wonderful dinner and time at Seoul Garden (Northpoint) with my friends. Meet up at 7 plus and we all will hunger for food as the moment we reach there.

Feel very pai sei sai... Accidentally step on Huixian slipper when I wanted to take the chicken and other food stuff. Opps! =X

Luckily never fell down. >_<"

Start cooking the raw food and Huixian was the prawn hunter as she will be the one peeling the prawn after cooking then we will help her clear up. It was funny while Talking rubbish/ making fun each other while eating (Most of the joke was on me lor... ) =_="

Every time i try to put the raw food in, the bit of oil will dancing happily till it hit my hand.. I become very busy as I got to cook the food for myself and her, scared she never eat while peeling the prawn for other people so I keep putting the cook food into her plate. Then I got fool by Candy thought she wanted to feed me the prawn but then up she eat herself. hahaha.. =S

Went to Time Zone and Mac after dinner to continue talking, then Kelvin/Candy start shooting me again... haha...

Walk home with Kelvin and Candy while we was chatting about current life... I start to tell kelvin how I want to change my life and tell him that I want to be happy!

I realise that whenever I feel sad or emo, I will drag their mood with me, Specially her... Don't wish her to be unhappy.

I also know by doing this will not solve the problem or the friends/buddy. This will only increase the work pressure of their current life.

A promises that I make to myself that I will lead with Happy/Cheerful life.

This will make her feel Good/friendly. Want to hear her laughters, carry her problem/worries away, see the beautiful smile on their face, Specially only for her :)

A Apple A Day, Keep The Doctor Away

- Doctor from around the world

A Smile A Day, Keep The Sadness Away

- Daniel Chua =P

2010-01-17T20:13:00.001+08:00

Hmm.... I so sick of looking myself at the mirror.... Haix... Should change myself in year 2010..

List of my plan... :D

Everyday Must Do Plan

20 Standard + 20 Spider Push Up before sleep
Brush My Teeth before sleep
Pray for the Love one Before sleep too
Cut Down on the "F" words day by day.
Read a chapter of book "How to talk to anyone" before Sleep (Improve my english)

Some Action Must Have Plan

Must Win her heart xP
Must tell her the truth in front of her.
Must have Confidence in Myself
Must be Romantic =X

2 Months Later Plan

Want to pass my Driving License
Want to apply for CPR and other Courses

1 year Later Plan

Want to pass all the Assignment and test
Want to work in EA (Singapore) as QA.
Want to get into OCS course in army.
Save money for laser operation on eyes. @_@

Life Time Changing Plan

Want to get fitter and healthier.
Want to heal the scar on my face
Want to Be Happy And Cheerful :D
Want to Improve my English.
Want to earn more money for me, family and my parent :D
Want to have more time with my parent, my love one and my family(If have)
Improve my Singing
Improve my Cooking (Just like my Mother)
Treasure the Love ones and brotherhood.

These are the current plan I have for today when I sleep in the bus... Super tired after work.. Die Die Must Work on these plan!! Will add in some more if I could think about it.. haha =X

2010-01-16T16:00:00.000+08:00

Went out with xian, Candy and kenny to Happy World(Northpoint) singing till midnight @ Thursday.. It was an wonderful event as we got to wait for kenny more then 45min plus plus doing nothing and I and candy went singing with any empty stomach.. I enjoy most of her singing as she very good at singing.

Chose only a few song as I not very good as singing like tone death.. so I will be singing in this tone

-> : Ahhhhhhhhh -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-.......

enjoy myself listening to them singing, they have such a Wonderful Voice!!! *Clap Clap*

They have wonderful singing tone like -> : Ahhhhhh ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~......

went home after the singing, chat with my parent till 1am plus then sleep... woke up around 5am... My mind was fill with her again so decide to use lappy till 7plus 8am.. Totally forget about the test in the morning... GG case!!!

Have no Hope for it... Can't do my test at all with my empty stomach... force myself to write something on the paper but nothing came out... Haix... lucky for ask my friend to print out the note for me... Only can do a few question but look like this test was going to fail...

Meet Ziu, Xian, kelvin and Yilok for dinner at Long John... So long never ate Long John... NICE~~~~ haha... Went home to help my parent with some stuff and return back to northpoint to join them for Kelvin don't know CNY or DND clothings. =_="

Heading to Xian house to play "Drinking Game"... Try to aim kelvin as he was the Acting Master and Question Master.. Got cheat by him every time... then as for the punishment was to drink up a cup of water.. All the guys are looking forward to the toilet after the game.... >_<

Meet kenny on friday, wanted to pass him the football manager game but it still have not been crack.. End up he cannot play the game... Haix... Went home and rest for a while... cannot meet kenny and xian for dinner due to work.. Went to Mac at airport then realise that I never bring money... Only have $2 onside... Hiax... 1 Mac Chicken please.... Have no mood to work... My heart and mind feeling so messy... What are you thinking about Daniel ?? Is it her again??

Went out this morning with my parent as just nice they off at the same date.. Have breakfast at Khatib and help my parent to buy household stuff... now going off to meet Jinglong and candy for late lunch... haix... I'm getting fatter and fatter instead of Slimming down ... T_T

2010-01-12T22:42:00.001+08:00

AHHHHHH!!!!!! Bloody Assignment!!! Haix....

Got to help my friend with his Comg Assignment but I still haven't finish my Audio assignment. Got to hand in by tomorrow morning/afternoon.... How am I doing to finish it by tonight?? Look like I need to burn Mid-Night oil again... T_T

Tomorrow lesson start at 9am... think will be late for class again...

Someone Please Give me a wakeup call @ 7.30am!!! T_T

Hiax...

* Don't worry, I Don't blame you.. I'm happy to do that for you... Share your problem with me.. I understand how you feel, It's very hard to carry this along... Let me carry it for you... :)

2010-01-11T12:38:00.000+08:00

I have no idea how to explain about this... Let this music explain on it own...

I have already try my best.... feeling very tired.... Too tired after jogging in the afternoon... Feel like giving up now but I don't wish too... Have been thinking a lot of stuff while jogging...

I really don't wish to see her unhappy because of me... Really.. Don't wish too....

What should I do?? What can I do ?? What must I do?? I Really don't know... Please tell me....

Sometimes, I Just too scared to take this step but since we have come here... Haix... I also not sure this should be happen or not... It's alright, I'm okay, waiting for your reply only....

2010-01-11T01:35:00.000+08:00

Yes!! Off Today!! Feel so sian, don't know what to do..

Start to write my application for the Gambit thing and play maple while having breakfast/lunch(Char Siew Rice) - $2.50.

Leaving my character for afk mode while doing the sunflower quest. Done with my application, apply for 3 different position in the company*. now only waiting to sent over with my portfolio...

* These are the 3 position which I applying for :)

Quality Assurance Lead: Works with the team to ensure that the game is engaging, playable, and easy to use. Responsible for leading focus and user testing, testing prototypes, and organizing defect testing.

Producer: Creates and organizes the team’s task lists; assists with task and team scheduling. Responsible for tracking overall team progress, noticing and dealing with schedule overruns, and keeping the team together and on target. Also in charge of team morale and spirit.

Programmer: Writes the code to implement the game. As the team’s technical expert, needs to work with the rest of the team to ensure the overall design is feasible.

Pray hard that they pick my Application and Pass their Interview on the 29 of Jan 2010!! >_<

I was call to do housework as Chinese New Year is coming and my father run away while I was doing... He was suppose to help but he say he got something to buy... Buy some stuff from 1plus till 3plus still have not came back... Hoo Great... =_="

Went to meet up with Xian and Jacelyn @ the Sun Plaza @ 3 plus to 4pm. It was my first time there har. What a small shopping centre it was.. haha.. Poor Xian... Cannot find her stuff and plan to went home due to someone is coming over her house and she also tired from working... (can understand that...). Take bus 856/859 back to Yishun Interchange and meet kelvin to buy his lappy hard disk is spoiled and decide to go to Jinglong house to replace kelvin new harddisk in the laptop. kelvin bought his new hard disk 320GB that cost about $99 and I bought alot of food like Pie kia, Fried Chicken and drinks for later short meeting... haha

Meet my secondary friend under her block and chat about her new house at Jurong then went home after that...

Just don't know what wrong with me...

Maybe I think too much... BAKA ME!!!

Just because I want to be with her, want to protect her, want to stay at her side... I becoming more and more selfish... Just simply don't care how she feel... Start doing some stupid thing that I should not do it at all... Really hate myself very much!! I'm Really Sorry about this! Please Forgive Me!

2010-01-10T00:30:00.000+08:00

7 Jan 2010 (Thursday)

Life is so wonderful to sleep and heard the rain drop outside of my house early in the morning. Don't feel like going to school as it was NYP Open House + raining day. Most of my friend will not be going as some of them will be helping out, some of them plan to pon due to only 1 lecture for the day and Friday also NO SCHOOL!!! so it will be a long weekend :D

Never expect myself to wake up on my own in time for school. haha.. *Because of her words...*

Fall off the bed at 8.30am, just as my eyes start to see clearly while I was laying on the floor, my body start to move on its own as was like taking me to toilet to bath, brush teeth and to do other stuff. I was ready for school by 8.55am. Start walking to my friend house, realise that my friend still sleeping... =_=

It took him about about 30min for him to be ready as I was sitting along in his living room stoning while waiting for him... Sianzor.... How I wish I could lay on my bed to sleep some more now~~ haha =P

I was so shock to see what happen inside the lecture when I open the door. Took a photo before the lecture... SUPER EMPTY!!! Look like less then 20 people turn up on that day... Time to half asleep inside the lecture! z_@

8 Jan 2010 (Friday)

Was chatting to friend on the phone till 4am morning, lay down on my bed and listen to the emo music while taking a nap. Sent a morning call message @5.30am, plan to sent the second one but I was totally knock out.. laying on my bed straight sleeping like a pig...

got disturb by my message as my boss ask me to work on T1 at Saturday. lazy to reply him so I went back to sleep. ok then... I awake!! No matter how I turn, placing myself with the comfortable position, I still cannot sleep... Decide to wake up liao...

Wash my face and start playing maple till late afternoon.. It was just a click click afternoon ha... Sian la!!! Plan to meet xian after her work to buy her hp cover and my aunt KFC value meal, went home shorty due to my work start at 7pm and xian not feeling well...

All thanks to my aunt, I have to finish up the KFC meal for her as she had a big bag of chips while waiting for me to buy for her... Leave house around 6pm after the so call dinner, feel like vomit after eating...

Start work from 7pm to 12am and it was Friday. Feel super bored at work... Our shop was so quite, alot of people went to the NTUC opposite of our shop at t3B2. Decide to read Archie's book while waiting for the time to pass. Do closing around 11.30pm and bought a book "How to talk To Anyone - Leil Lowndes" cost around $17++ (after 25% discount) for myself. Take company transport home.

Found this book very interesting. It was about building confidently at speak well in business meetings, and have the best jobs, nicest parties, and most interesting friends. Read a few page then shall head for bed. Got to Jump Shift, From PM shift to AM shift.. Guess only sleep about 4 hours then got to head for work... Haix...

9 Jan 2010 (Saturday)

Garrrr!!!! I want to sleep!!!! Really sleep for 4 hours then head out for work... Been doing cashiering since morning till afternoon... Doing the same old thing for the past 5 years too... then suddenly a customers was very moody, so I try using the skill that the book teach *The Flooding Smile* on the customers. The customers thanks me for the smile that brighten up their day as she face a very rude customer services just now. Feel happy for her as I can Brighten their day :)

Fall asleep on the bus... Almost miss my stop at Yishun.. haha.. Guess I will end up in Woodland Bus Interchange if I continue sleeping till the end of the trip.... haha >_<

*Don't flash an immediate smile when you greet someone, as though anyone who walked into your line of sight would be the beneficiary. Instead, look at the other person's face for a few second. Pause. Soak in their persona. Then let a big, warm, responsive smile flood over your face and overflow into your eyes. it will engulf the recipient like a warm wave. The split-second delay convinces people your flooding smile is genuine and only for them.

2010-01-06T18:59:00.000+08:00

Sianzor... So many bad things happen to me in a day...

Late for lesson about 20min to 25min in the morning.
Almost got a bad rating today because late submit of practical work by 1 min.
The lab door hit my right toe when I was trying to open it.
Almost fall off the ladder when I was doing housework.
Got scolding from mother for not bring key with me.

Feel very tired and body ache after all the housework... Look like I getting old as time pass so fast. I will be age 21 in just 4 more month times. Haix... I want to go Kbox or Happy World to sing!!! but but... I have a dead tone... No matter how I sing, it will be just flat voice... but still.... I want to sing!!! :D

I went to Northpoint to meet Huixian, Pig and wolf for Long John about 8pm plus.. I was happy to see her and sad as I got shoot by pig most of the time, even I keep quite to myself... but still... haha

After the markan at Long John, we went to NTUC to buy some stuff, so luck that wolf drop his 10cents at the cashier and roll off to somewhere which cannot be seen. he did something that we were laughing out head off. haha

Once Huixian done with her payment at NTUC, we have decide to go to her house to slack and chat. Just in time, Ah bee bring her maths paper to the living room where we all are gathering, and kelvin start helping her...

About 15min have gone... he still cannot solve it, so wolf join him....

Now... 30min have gone... Both guys still trying their best to solve the maths problem and kelvin was piss off as he cannot solve it... *If I not wrong, another 5min have gone, Huixian decide to do.*

Another 15min gone again, Huixian have finish the maths question, kelvin and wolf still solving it.

Just too bad I cannot help them as I was a Maths Baka... So got to let them settle =S

Huixian smallest sister was so funny as she was talking in her dream,. The moment Xian ask her to go back sleep, she keep quite then after a while she talk again. haha.. Since Huixian done the maths question, she try to made her smallest sister back to sleep and then still got time to chat with Jacelyn, Jenny and other more at msn. After everything was done, they took 30min to react to Huixian answer. She the girl out of the guys that solve 2 maths question out of 3. haha

So luck of me... Just a the moment I touch my phone, my mother call as she was going to sleep soon. So I got to rush back if not, I will be sleeping with Xiao Meng and others. >_<

After all, It was a fun day, I was very glad and happy to know her, she was a girl with pure heart. Looking after her sister, love them and protect them with her life. I wish I can help her more and make her happy.

2010-01-06T01:22:00.000+08:00

OMG!!! I did it again!!! So hard to quit.. Cannot stop myself from telling more lies... It just like spell A to Z and count 1 to 10... Just don't know how long I can Stop lying... Someday, I will hurt someone deeply... Someone stop me please!!!

Had been rushing Level Design Assignment 2 since 4 of Jan, only get a chance to sleep for 4 hours at 2am then got to wake up at 6am to continue my assignment.. Almost fall asleep during the Japanese class today >_<

My teacher keep calling for me to answer the question.. End up the only answer will be " HUH ?!?! ". Finally, my group submit the level assignment about 4 plus 5pm and I also free from the Japanese Class at the same time too :P

So Happy about it~~ :D

Faster rush home and bath, rush out of house and head to Northpoint for Dinner with friends at Mac. the hunger was killing me, with only a piece of rice cake for breakfast till dinner. It was my first time order Mega Mcspicy with the upsize of drinks(Green Tea) and fries(Shakers Fries). I have no idea how to eat when I look at it... It was too big for my mouth so I was thinking should I eat the meat first or the bread first?? Still cannot decide... why not eat together ?? Had my first bite on it... OMG!!!! All the meat was inside my mouth, it was so hard to chew har.. Again... It ended inside my tummy~~~ haha :P

Hoo man, feel super full har!! It was imba to the MAX man and the best dinner of the day! :)

Saw Pig(kelvin), Earthworm(Milo) and Wolf at the KFC then have a chat with them and we head to Huixian house to play card game " Number 99". *Don't know how to explain the rules here >< *

It ok... Don't need to guess so much, I will be the one that got most forfeit from the game. As I was sitting between kelvin and Wolf, they will sure attack me like mad har. Just to let you know, the player who got the forfeit will drink half cup of green tea but I had such a wonderful dinner... HOW AM I GOING TO FINISH THE GREEN TEA?? Q_Q" but lucky Huixian help me to finish my green tea as she was thirsty. So nice of her har!

We have to go home as time comes to the end of the day.. Had such a wonderful time with them and dinner too~~ :)

I also open up my feeling to her... Now only for the right time... Only heaven knows~~

Had a little chat with my parent and plan to do my assignment but suddenly my visual studio is down!! Bloody Hell!!! Now all my work is stuck... Sianzor!! T_T

What to do now?? I also don't know... Haix....

2010-01-03T18:56:00.000+08:00

I just don't know what to write here...

These question keep running on my mind..

Am I worthy for her?
what I did is right or wrong?
Will I able to bring her happiness or will I bring her with sadness?
Can I provide all the need that she want or I just have to leave it to her ??
by doing all these stuff, is the history going to repeat again?

There is something missing from my life.. Is it her or or or I also not sure..

very uncomfortable inside, very lost and no mood for everything... I wish I can shout out but I can't... Run away from the fact but I can't too..

It just hurt me so much when I say "I and you are just friends.." Sometime, I just wish I can tell her the truth instead of hiding it....

It does not matter how hard the task is, as long you are happy with it and no matter what happen, I wish I could be there for you.

Hope you can understand... Everything I Do, I Do It For You..

My First and My Last Time

2009-12-28T21:15:00.001+08:00

Don't know what my mind is thinking about.. Yesterday feeling very tired so I went to bed at 12.30am and guess what, I'm awake at 3.30am =_="

Looking and stoning at my dark room celling don't know what to do, try to went back to sleep but could not sleep any more. Lazy to use lappy so start to think what assignment have I finish and what can I do to make my life better. Though of many ways to improve my life and how to plan my assignment but suddenly I remember what happen on the chrismas day..

It was a worst case which I say to my brothers. I actually lie to them but that I have something on so I make them wait from 3pm to 8pm just for me. We decide to meet up at my friend house, by the time I reach, I still continue with my lie but it was too late to stop... In the end, my friend found out about my lie and I got a big scolding from them..

My very best friend say these words to me: "What so good about telling lie??", "Don't you trust me??", "We brothers for so long and yet you lie to us!". With 1 words out of my mouth, they help me with no 2nd words and now I lies to them over small tiny matter. When I think back.. I think I have addicted of telling lies to people.

Damn.. This Shall Be My First and Last Lie That I Did And This Thing Will Never And Never Happen Again Forever In Life. Nothing Good Will Happen If People Found Out About The Lie and Worst Case Can Even Happen Too. Since I post here, mean that I will quit telling lies to people. Please Trust me!

*PS :

Sorry about this Brothers and My Friends!

Movie Gathering (Chaw)

2009-12-27T23:07:00.000+08:00

Thanks to Huixian and Jacleyn for this movie gathering!

Hoo man... Feeling super tired and quiet... Don't know why... Maybe... Hiax... I also not sure too...

Body aching, now my eyes want to close and my brain seem to shut down, can't even spell / type / say the correct words... damn... I suck at English. Should brush up my English more!

Let see what I did today... Went to gym with candy at 11am till 12 plus, go home for a rest then start my housework till 3 plus and at 4plus went out for movie (Chaw) with Huixian, Jacelyn and Kenny at AMK hub cathey and lastly, we went to yishun for dinner at KFC. Order a value meal and cheese fires for myself and we will chatting till 10plus - 11pm.

Chaw is a Korean movie. Nice, Exciting and funny but I don't understand what the people are saying so I only read the subtitle and watch their acting. haha

I shall talk more about chrismas Eve and chrismas tomorrow.. too tired to carry on.. Z_Z

Good Nights ~~~

After so long...

2009-12-23T19:00:00.000+08:00

It been a long since i touch this blog... So many things have happen... Most of them are sad case which i don't wish to talk much... Still the same old me... haha...

After 5 yeas have pass, i finally able let go of her... after all, she is the girl who i like but i didn't get a chance to tell her... now is the time which i don't wish to make the same old mistake again... I meet a girl which i like a the first slight but look like i don't have a chance to say so... Hiax...

Finally reach Poly Year 2 Second Sem of the course... The course was getting harder and harder till I wanted to give up... As there was a limit of what I doing , just can't seem to waste anymore time on what i doing. Just have to carry on with my footstep till the end...

Very confuses with what I doing... Don't know what I did was right or wrong... Should I go Continue where I started or Just wish that this should not happen at first...

lol... What a day man...

2009-02-05T14:32:00.000+08:00

I start to dream of her again... wake up at 2 am in the night, feel so empty in my life man... so many thing runuing in my mind, so many thing to think about it... feel so useless... Totally feel so different in my life... no matter what happen, I always alone for myself... just like I and my own world listen to music... but I just like those sad music which I really wanted to sing out loud that all the problem could just forget about it... Life without her is totally pointless...

My mind is lock with her voice... Looking at her and yet I could not reach out for her. Wanted to Stay by her side when she is down... Just want to make her happy... Or maybe I just scared to fall in love with her ??

Just very confuses....

Maybe I just think too Much...

2009-01-24T14:59:00.000+08:00

Time to update blog again...

Garr!! So many think happen to me while I was away from blog... Hiax...

Stress with all the schoolwork and assignment for me to catch up with... Many People also spam my chatblog... Cannot get alone with my classmate... Feeling very tired... Feeling very lost... and feeling really down too... Just feel like I am not myself anymore... With alot of things runing in my mind... starting to hate myself with everything I do and planing ...

Is it I change too much or I never change at all ??
Going to Poly is the right Choice For me or going to Army is the right choice for me ??

I also don't know...

Sometime, I really wanted to cry out... scream out... let all the pain that I have flow out of me... Sometime, I just wish I would disappear from this world without anyone know about me...

But I just could not bear the pain to leave my family and my new friend behind...And I also wanted to tell her that I have fall in love with her( Luckly I never tell her)... Cause I don't want the history to come back to me again... Watching her happy will be enough for me... Now all I can do is keep to myself...

lalalala

2009-01-22T19:00:00.000+08:00

lalalala....

Qiu Yi... look so angry today !!! haix... don't be angry and be happy !! haha (-_-")

I'm sick...

2009-01-03T13:48:00.000+08:00

Garr... OMG!!! Feel so sick man in the morning, when I woke up... Garr...

Had such a bad flu till now... Think my fever coming soon... Garr... Going to die soon liao... haha... (-_-")

Now I'm working ... But not many people is flying off @ terminal 1... Most of them is at @ terminal 2 or 3.( more high class )... Haix... And yet, now I updating my blog here during working time.... Haha...

EveryThing I do Is a Mistake...

2009-01-02T20:53:00.000+08:00

2nd day of the year of 2009. I feel so Sad...

Went to bed at 5am... After Finish The PPMAN Presentation... Feel so tired in the morning, don't even feel like leaving my bed when my alrms rings... But have to go school for AC++ assignment... So have no choice but to leave my bed for school... Trying to getting ready, Rushing out of my house wondering if there any cab cause late for class...

There cab outside of my house just nice... So without second thought, I went into the cab and head to school...

OMG!! I reach school almost 10am, so faster rush thought the assignment and faster handup to the lecture...

After the AC++ assignment, I, Qiu Yi, Wan Xuan Elicia, Choo Yan and ck too went to MAC for lunch while seeing Qiu Yi breaking the new record of the DJ MAX ( BLACK SQUARE ). WOW !! Pro man Qiu Yi !! Get A+ with every music she play...

Times flies as we kill time at mac till 2pm for maths... OMG !! I cannot control my eyes anymore... The more I control my eyes, the more I want to sleep man.. GG TO THE MAX !!! haha.. Soon went to maths lecture room and less then 5 min I start to fall asleep without knowing it... But inless then 10 min Miss Massie saw me sleep and start to call me... Haix... There goes my sleep...

Yea!! Maths Lesson end... while wait for the PPMAN presentation @ 4.30pm, can't wait for anymore, I start playing DJ MAX ( BLACK SQUARE )... It HIGH TO THE MAX !!

As I get scolding from Choo Yan at the lift witing for Si Hui to cometo level 5 @ block M...
* Reason : She have not see the presentation slide...

Hiax... Sad man...

Just in time.. Si Hui reach, so I start tell the member about the details of the presentation...

Hope Everything seem goes with my plan...

During the presentation, I think I feel scared or what ( I don't even know.... ) I think I cut everyone while presenting. Trying to be very detail about this presentation of the game...

After the presentation, everyone look so/very .... ..... .( I also don't know too ... Really... ) But a bad feeling telling me that something bad is going to happen... When I went out of the room, everyone is missing... As I walk to the lift... Everyone start to tell me all sort of thing that I did during the presentation is wrong...

From this, Everything I do is a mistake... Feel so sad, Really so sad... All kind of mood is gone... Totally gone...But aleast I know my mistake which it shall be appearin future...

haix... reach work place @ 7pm, ( Dame late man... ) My boss, wanted me to rush the report of my sales target to him by 8pm... Only less then 1 hour for him... How to do man... Garr...

Don't wish to talk so much... ( sound dame emo man... ) Just feel very Sad to the MAX !!!

Finish work at 11 pm... now heading from terminal 1 to terminal 3 bus interchange to aboard bus...

Just wish, this day is a dream which appear once...
I Wish Tomorrow Will Be A Better day... Much More Better then Today... Haix...

Dream...

2008-12-11T12:45:00.000+08:00

Last night I had a dream about you. In this dream, I'm talking 'long beside you. And it looked like everyone was having fun. The kind of feeling I've waited so long. Don't stop come a little closer, As we chat the rhythm gets stronger.There's nothing wrong with just a little little fun. We were chatting all night long. The time is right to put my arms around you. You're feeling right. You wrap your arms around too. But suddenly I feel the shining sun. Before I knew it this dream was all gone. I don't know what to do. About this dream and you. I wish this dream comes true.

When i woke up in the midder of the night, sitting at the corner of the bed thinking about her... Somehow something told me that this dream would ever come true...

The next morning... I wish i could dream about her again... but no matter how I try, I still could not see her at my dream anymore...

24hours is not enought for me

2008-12-06T10:45:00.000+08:00

Dear Blog Readers,

These few days, I have been very busy for my assignment and other test. Don't even have thime time to do other stuff... So many things happen around me making me feel so stress and tired and scared too...

haix...

Don't worry, I will you all update soon, I promiss!

Heehee..

cheers xD

New Song on List !!

2008-12-02T22:23:00.000+08:00

While I was trying upload new song for my blog, I saw some comment left by other user about the song andI saw this. Let you have a clear idea of Guys or Lady's flirt method.

HOW GUYS FLIRT:

1. He stares at you alot.
2. He hits you alot. (just play hitting )
3. He uses the first thing that pops into his head to start a converstaion with you
4. He yelled, "Hi!", to your mum that day she picked you up from school.
5. He blew off his buds to go see "Brown Sugar" with you cuz you couldn't get another girl pal to go and didn't want to go alone.
6. He tries to make you laugh anyway even if he gets hurt in the process
7. His voice gets softer when ever you two talk.
8. You hung up on him. He called you back.
9. You were invited by him to a group outing.
10. He called you to talk about nothing at all.
11. He imitates your laugh. OK, you do laugh PRETTY LOUD. Which makes you laugh even harder...
12. He remembers little things you mention in casual conversation
13. He sometimes stares straight into your eyes.
14. He uses every possible way to touch you (your hair, face, thighs, KNEES,ect.)

HOW GIRLS FLIRT:

1.She calls you by your full name not just a nick name.
2. She hits you softly on the arm and laughs when you say something funny.
3. She flips her hair when she's talking to you.
4. She touches your arm when she talks to you.
5. She says, "No, I'm not telling you who I like!" with a big smile on her face.
6. She asks you who you like or who you would go out with seemingly interested.
7. When you go to the movies with a bunch of your friends and she is almost always next to you.
8. She criticizes you on a girl you like.
9. You catch her staring at you.
10. She plays with your hair or tries to put make up on you.
11. Her friends outside of school and in school know about you, and says she talks about you a lot.
12. She knows your phone number and address. ( stalker much? )
13. She will try and talk, and spend time with you as much as possible

I'm not sure about this... but maybe for the girls can try it out ! heehee..

OMG!!! Check it out my next post, I trying to post about someone who do not know how to eat "Ice Kachang".

Time Flies...

2008-11-26T20:27:00.000+08:00

While i was walking back from school at Yio Chu Kang, i started to think about my life when i was in ITE, still remembering that i was striving to achieved GPA of 4.0 and trying to be the top student in ITE.

I remembered it was 8.50am, when the first time when i step into ITE. I suddenly notice an unknown substance flew down to my floor and as I walked over, I notice it a nothing more then saliva. I was totally so shocked that i believed it would better for me to walk faster to my class which was level 4 (I think so... or one more level up?). Anyway at that time, i still remembered I was the only student who tuck in the shirt, like a secondary school student.

When I stepped into the class, I took a short glance not knowing any of them, and within seconds they stared at me, which make me feel very uneasy. How I wish the class could end within 5 minutes. BUT MY COURSE WAS TWO LONG YEARS... Q_Q (how am I going to survived in this state ?? ) haha...

I Still remembered that the first teacher i met said " Welcom to ITE !, I believe you will have a good time ! ". But the best of all best is what he say to me "Don't look back of what you done... Now since you have this chance, Don't miss it !!! Keep going on !!! ". Just with these words, I felt like I had really wasted too much time playing during my secondary school days. Without thinking too much, I just really wanted to attend school everyday without failing.

As time files fast ... (2 years) ... After all my hardwork I have done in ITE, I pass my final exam with flying colours ( 4.0 GPA ). I was so happy with it, ( i do not have to stay in this kind of place ). Anyway at night, I went to celebrate with my family for the very first time of success in my life. After dinner with my family, I went out with my secondary school friends to have my second round... we went to pub and drank alcohol (I wasted lots of money there).

The very next day, I got a call from my very best friend (Wu Jinglong) asking about the open house of NYP, so I went down to take a look... WOW !!! Never step into this beautiful place before, hence I choose to stay on with my friend to look around

While walking with my friends in NYP, my friend walked towards to Jaime Ho and started telling about my studies and she said that i could join this course ( DET ) !!!

Now, it has been 1 year and 2 sem at NYP... under the course of DET... I could say that it is very stress... because i do not have A maths and coding knowledge. But I have the passion for modeling using Maya ( It's Fun To The MAX !!!! ) haix... Time for me to study hard again. haha..

Since now I am given a chance to study, So Do Not Waste It!

As Time Goes By, People Will Start To Disappear From This World So Treasure Everything You Have And Love Those Who Are Still Living In This World! Every Minutes and Every Seconds You Have.

Surely You Will Find The Right Way To Which You Really Want!

Cheers xP